Boringest Weekendiest

Aiet crew, here's the beef: I'm super dang-ass bored. Everything sucks - I'm wearing tight pants, so I feel fat. I have homework to do, but I'm not, so I'm screwed. Depressing, blah, blah, sucky, blah, blah crap. Okay, done.

So onto happy - here is a picture of me after the longest-ass bikeride of my life:

See the look of bliss on my face? I'm just gross and sweaty and pumped.

Some more happy - here is a picture of my ass in one of my favorite pairs of jeans:

If you want some better shots, just message me......you sickos! What do you take me for. GOSH.

So I'm doing this diet thingy...don't make fun. It's only for two weeks, starting yesterday, and I think it's going to be okay. Today I did have some sugar-free chocolate-covered raisins, but I don't know if that is expressly prohibited. I'll let you know if I end up super-skinny and then I will go on to sell this diet to the greater western world.

Don't worry, I don't actually think you care about my drivel...but at least someone reads this stuff, so I'll keep on posting. WOOT WOOT.

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In the Immortal Words of Lindsay Lohan

Thursday I went to Rumors Comedy Club - holy man! How many jokes about shitting your pants can someone make and you still laugh until you cry? Can't beat free laughs...those are the best kind. Thanks Kelly & Cephas!

WORLD NEWS: I had my first beer yesterday. Yes, this is the honest truth. I had a Moosehead. I realize now that I haven't been missing out all this time...chocolate martinis are still the way to go.

Dammit, why does it feel like family gatherings happen every few months? Oh wait, it's because they do. Can I kill myself now from overeating? Curse all you lovely mothers, aunts, and cousins that prepare such deliciousness that I stuff my face until even the fattest guy in the room is staring at me, bug-eyed. Curse all of you! Monday I begin my diet...yes...Monday.

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Bike-iest!!

I dreamed and I thought and I hoped for a bike:

And then I got a new bike! Check out the newest member of the fam:

LOVES IT! I am sending out a special thanks to Brett and Gord's for not laughing at me too much and helping me out. Woot!

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Lame-o Video-o

Hola. My face has de-puffified, thanks for asking. It has now shunk to this amazingly skinny, hot, sunken-cheekbones, model-type facial bone structure. Psych! April Fools....only three days late.

So I've posted some videos for the plain, shit-faced reason to take advantage of the new feature. They are boring EXCEPT for the sideways video of Jean eating greek food. CHECK IT OUT Y'ALL! Har har.

Dang, I have nothing else for now. I have to go to class tonight, so that sucks all the fun out of me. Our lecture today is on Audit Planning with Analytical Procedblah blah blah blah blahs. YAY!

Out.

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