Went East-er

As is tradition, I headed to Calgary for Easter. I went East-er, get it?!? (Booo!) Anyway, no better person/place to visit than my sister, Sis. I somehow managed to convince her to drop major coinage on a Calgary/Canucks game (remember, this is 2012 and the Canucks are reasonably decent. Heck, they may win the President’s Trophy), so this trip, for me, I was losing my shizz. As is normal for me, when going to see the Canucks, I put on my full regalia – hair extentsions, plastered on make-up, and jersey for the entire day. Hey...don’t judge. Sis invited one of her friends along (thankfully, a Canucks fan – this train don’t stop for no Flames Fools) and we started our Cancucky adventure at the Dutton Lounge at the Saddledome. We were in the minority, but felt immediate rapport with anyone in a ‘Nucks jersy. ‘Course.










Yum? I guess I forgot the “before” picture.



Obvio I forced everyone to watch the pre-skate with me – best part of the whole game (especially when they lose.)




That time when Kes had blonde hair.


What ever happened to Bitz?


Sami Salo staring me down to death AGAIN. I wonder what he has against me?




My sister said, “This IS pretty cool” when Luongo and his bum hung out right by. Indeed.




In case you can’t tell, I love me some 2012 Edler.




MURPH!



In case you couldn’t tell, this is a pretty hockey-oriented post rn.


My bb in the sin bin.


A hockey game.


LAPP!

So they lost. And people were making fun of us in the parking lot. THANKS A LOT CANUCKS!

Shifting away from that stanky loss, me and Sis got up to more shenanigans. Of course, we went to Holt Renfrew where I (apparently) convinced Sis to buy her first Hermes scarf. Wha? Me? That doesn’t sound like me at all. We also ate dinner at a restaurant where the ladies were really fancy:


To the left (to the left.)



We also spent some time watching the childhood classic, “Jem”.


”Synergy! I need your help!”


Someone’s excited about their new Hermes scarf.

For the last Canucks game of the season (yup, we’re back here), we went to some pig restaurant on 8 Ave.




I’ll take two whole roast pigs, please.

On Easter Sunday, we went to some Executive Inn or something and had brunch. Sis likes food and is the best food eater ever.



We also did some shopping and playing of Akinator the Genie.




Cliché shoe shot. Were my pants really that short? Doesn’t surprise me.


Who is this little kid? High tables, man.

We also did some 17th. Can’t not do 17th.







I also happened to find this amazing machine of temporary tattoos.



That Lorena Bobbitt tattoo was tempting, but too much risk that I wouldn’t get it. Biggest regret of my life.

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Not Ready for the Jelly

Cowgirls of the world, unite! But I won’t join you. Because I’m not one. I’m just stuck in this horse-forsaken town. Or not stuck. Just visiting. Yay! Another day! We got up at a reasonable hour to take in some doughnuts with Sis’s friend Carlo. I like to say his name by, like, snapping my fingers and drawling it with a Spanish accent. I’ll do it for you sometime if you ask me nicely. We headed to this new joint, Jelly.







I don’t think I was ready…for this jelly. It was too bootylicious for me. I had this little breakfast box thing with a gross red delicious apple and some yogurt. The doughnut was decadent though – coconut custard. Yummo.

Sis had organized some sister time after brekkie, and so we headed out to some Winatoba-mall-like place for manicures. We couldn’t figure out how to get inside as the sign appeared above a Co-op store? Very bizarre. We just headed through the Winatoba hallway and, voila! Mani-pedi central.





This was the nicest they looked at any point. The polish, though shiny and glorious to start, refused to dry for a full 24 hours and thus I woke up the next morning with cute blanket-imprint lines. Yay.

Anyway, after the spa time, we headed to a sophisticated B lunch. We ordered requisite martinis and everything.









Our next activity came on like a Chinook. We jay-walked across the road from Sis’s house, to Chinook Centre, and tried some shopping. And then I saw more Calgary monstrosities. This city has much to learn about style.





Oi! My eyes are burning! Yeesh. See? Some girl with her pants down. Does looking at this display make you want to buy any of the items? Heavens to Murgatroyd!!

We headed out for a late dinner to Olive Garden, because it’s a classy establishment. And Sis wanted breadsticks. Turns out the Olive Garden in Calgary has some of the heavenliest goods as far as Olive Gardens go. I like that.



The next morning we decided to give 17th Ave another try. We sat on the patio at a pasta place and tried to enjoy some sun.



We then found another cat head shop. This time we went inside. It was pretty cat-heady.









A shoe store was selling United Nude shoes and I asked to try on a pair. I asked for a size and he brought out a pair. I tried to put it on my feet and it was clearly wayyy too small. I was like, ‘zugh? Why doesn’t it fit?’ And he was like, ‘ohh…I don’t actually have your size, but maybe a smaller one would fit..’ Idiot. I know how big my feet, are thx.

We parked near some hippies doing laundry.



Oh yes! Today was Easter too. Sorry, Lord. I didn’t really forget that you left the tomb. So let’s feast. Sis and I stocked up on goods at Superstore and cooked ourselves a delightful dinner to celebrate the occasion.





The night concluded with some wine swilling and the made-for-TV-movie about Will and Kate. He had soo much hair.




ilu pswilm.

Easter Monday we headed out to Kensington, where some lady told us (unprovoked) how to cross a street. Thanks.





Dinner was at a Chinese buffet since we thought we found one that wasn’t, you know, dumpy with loads of msg.





On the plane that night, I looked out the window and to my surprise, I thought another Westjet plane was flying right alongside us. YES. A BLONDE MOMENT.



Ha…ha?

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